I still want to die.

I’m not depressed. I just feel this empty hole inside my body and it doesn’t matter what I do it can’t be filled. I can’t fight this feeling anymore…I wish, no wait I pray that something happens to me and that I die. I hate living in this world I can’t deal with anything thrown my way anymore. I feel so weak. PLEASE LET ME JUST REST IN PEACE. I don’t care if you call me a coward, I don’t care what you feel, I’ve “felt” for other people for so long now and it has only made me feel worse. I should just let people rot the way they let me rot. we’re all going to die anyway I’m just requesting an early leave. I’m tired of getting treated like I don’t matter in this world. This is my only prayer tonight. Thank you for understanding.

I’m sorry to all the people I’ve hurt or that I will hurt. I’m sorry mami and I’m sorry papi I love you with all my heart and soul and I would do anything ever in my power to make you happy. I wish I could have made you prouder and I’m sorry I didn’t but you have taught me so many great things, you are appreciated.

I’m sorry to all of my great friends, they are the best I’ve ever had. I thank you deeply for everything you have ever done for me. I’m so sorry things had to be this way.

I’m sorry for crying over guys who didn’t give a shit about me but by this last one I learned, I learned that no one could really ever love me.

I’m sorry to all the people I have ever treated like shit, and I’m sorry to all the people I’ve hurt. you all know who you are.

thanks. goodbye.

I want to die

I don’t care for your words anymore,
and nothing you can do or say
will make me want to stay.

I am not needed here anymore.
And though, I’ve left footprints in your mind they too will begin to fade.

I was never worth remembering.
No one ever cared to try and get to know this tinted mind of mine.
But do not worry, I hold no grudges
Because in the end I was probably the one to blame.

LM 12.10.2014